A common complaint I hear when I work with a company is, “Dennis, I just don’t get enough feedback.” After 25 years of working with all types of organizations, I believe the greatest barrier to personal growth is receiving constructive feedback on your own behavior. Growth demands change and change requires feedback. If I can’t see it, I can’t change it.
When you hear the word feedback, what comes to mind? Most think of feedback negatively, as in a reprimand. It typically has an unfavorable connotation. Whether it’s presented positively or negatively, it’s designed to improve someone. What you believe about feedback ultimately determines how you receive it. Just as you receive people as you perceive them, you accept feedback in direct relation to what you believe about feedback.
Think about feedback as a gift. What do you do when someone gives you a present? You unwrap it, think about the giver, and accept it for what it is: a gift. Sometimes you don’t need the gift, so you put it aside. Other times, you give it to someone else. It’s the same with feedback. Only when you look at feedback as a gift and unwrap it, can you determine whether the feedback has merit.
Even if the feedback you receive isn’t accurate, it’s valuable knowing the other person’s perception of you. It’s useful. Do you want them to see you that way? If not, at least you know how to change that perception. When you learn to value feedback, you’ll begin to solicit it.
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