Frustrated with situations & people
not changing fast enough?
We’ve all been there. We want results and quality outcomes, but everywhere we turn there are roadblocks. We try to push forward only to get detoured by the drama. We see the potential of what could be, but just can’t get past the blaming and complaining that is around us. It’s frustrating, I know. While you might not always be able to stop The Drama, you can learn to stop Your Drama.
One of my wife’s favorite quotes is, “Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain”. It’s a great picture of someone that keeps their focus on only what they can control. You cannot control the weather. Sometimes it rains. There is nothing you can do about it. But what you can control is your response to the rain.
One of the first steps in creating drama-free teams is first learning to separate The drama from Your drama. You can’t stop the rain, but you can learn to navigate the ship even in a storm. Many times circumstances are out of our control. You cannot control the economy. You cannot control other people. In fact, there are very few things you can control. Personal drama creeps in when people focus on things that are simply outside of their control. Frustration, resentment, anger, bitterness sneak in and destroy personal productivity. Many times, it’s simply a result of misaligned focus.
What can you control?
You are in charge of you. Nothing else. To believe otherwise, is an exercise in frustration. If you focus on trying to control other people’s actions, you’ll live in a state of frustration. People frequently ask me, “Dennis, how do I motivate my team?” Truthfully, people are going to do what they do. Someone’s motivation flows out of their personal motive. It’s their personal why. That’s something that’s hard to change. You cannot control other people. Stop trying.
You are ridiculously in charge of you. You cannot control events, circumstances or people. You only can control yourself. People that live drama-free understand that it’s not the event that determines their circumstances, but it’s their response to that event that will determine the outcome. Taking control of your response will eliminate your personal drama.
Event + Response = Outcome
You are in control of your response. Drama-full people believe they have no control. It’s their circumstances or the events that happen to them that are determining their results. Don’t believe this lie. Your reaction to what’s happening around you determines the results you get. Nothing else. Because you’re in charge of your reactions, you determine your outcomes.
It’s true, you might not be able to stop someone else’s drama, but you certainly can stop your own drama. You can take back your personal power by owning your response. You can’t control events. But you are ridiculously in charge of you. Are you dissatisfied with the outcome? Stop trying to control the event. Take control of you and change your response. It makes all the difference.
What can you do today, to take control of your response?