When someone brings you a problem and asks what to do, what’s your typical response? Don’t overthink it. Do you discuss the issue with them? Ask them more questions about their problem and try to get them to a resolution?
That’s very noble and no doubt motivated by a good heart, but what if you tried a different approach? What if you just asked them a question right back?
“What are you going to do about this problem you have?”
It’s a hard question, but it’s an awesome one! It does a couple of great things:
- It shows the person that you believe they are powerful enough to solve their own problems.
If I think you’re a victim, I feel bad for you and do my best to tell you how to solve your problem. But if I believe you’re a powerful person, I’m confident in your ability to handle the problem.
- It helps the person to own their stuff.
Ownership is powerful because it allows people to make changes. People never change what they refuse to own and lack of ownership only leads to complaining and blaming. That negativity doesn’t produce anything positive. On the other hand, people that take responsibility for themselves grow. They become problem solvers and are able to generate solutions. They get better and confidence follows.
Need some help learning how to ask the kinds of questions that empower your team? Text “Questions” to 864-901-7315. I’d love to send you a copy of the Top 20 Coaching Questions to help people stop playing the victim and relieve you from being the rescuer.
The mark of a great leader isn’t followers- it’s the ability to develop other leaders. When you’re able to stop being a rescuer, you’re able to be that kind of leader.